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  1. the train

    by , July 29th, 2014 at 09:22 PM (The way home)
    hey. its been a long while time wise .. but believe me it feels just like yesterday my life was turned on its head. I'm still battling depression .. its debilitating .. even looking at that profile pic of when i thought everything was perfect makes me cry right now . Rana i knew has gone.im feeling like I'm in a neither world. floating lost.waiting to come down. both the kids are coping a lot better as we have moved interstate.im not sure i like it here ... but i don't know what i like or don't ...
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  2. Eyes of ice.

    by , June 21st, 2013 at 02:04 PM (The way home)
    nearly 8 months ago I discovered through my husband of 14 years attempt at suicide he'd sexually abused my oldest daughter. I've experienced grief on the deepest levels imaginable. Depression .. And my own want for death ... But through healing. Counselling ... Learning and the unconditional love for my children I'm slowly on my way back ... I'm changed yes ... But a work in motion and I don't expect much anymore.
    Ive lost much trust and instinct through this but i still have some hope through
    ...
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  3. The crimson rod

    by , July 21st, 2012 at 04:02 PM (The way home)
    ... im in an unaltered state , limbo yet functioning,neither here nor there,nor am i sad ,im happy,just plain, o..r..d..i..n..a..r..y in the most simple of ways .. paused . i and two others have made a deliberate desire to meet once a week to discuss "spirit " life/existence. we will have no predetermined ajendas only see what happens over cups of tea and muffins .. once you decide to do this as a group or as an individual the universe trully does here this intention, this classroom of ...
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  4. im not your crocodile

    by , June 24th, 2012 at 05:59 AM (The way home)
    ... i am in the strangest place .. a human place with a spirit mind ..too weird .. so over it .. the every day hum drum ..the sameness ..the fakeness of it all ..people .. the having too's .. of course on the grandest scale of it all in its universal meaure it is necessary but it doesnt stop one IN this human body with this human mind still filtering ..booming in to the inner divine place which i hide in to feel sanity while the world clangs noisily away while i hide and cover my ears and go SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH ...
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  5. tears of a clown

    by , March 30th, 2012 at 08:41 AM (The way home)
    this song came to mind today and cooincides with what i am feeling right now that i couldnt place ..i feel like crying for no particular reason except i FEEL sad intuitively but no tears form .. but the sadness is real ..when i feel this way as an intuitive or for us all connected to spirit i know it is what we say ENERGETIC we are picking up on universal energy .. and today it was a deep sadness and almost major shrug of the shoulders , disappointment in the human race for the attrocities and the ...
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